Happy Sunday all! It’s time for another entry from Harlow Jones’ Journal! If you haven’t read the first one, do so now, otherwise you’ll be a little confused!
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I’ve lived in North Bay now for three months. We moved up the day I finished grade 11. I found a job almost immediately, refusing to be stuck at home with Mom and Larry a moment longer. It was bad enough in Toronto. Lauren had been my only friend, and I didn’t have anyone else to hang out with. I hated how they treated me. Like I was fragile. The whispers that would follow me while I walked down the halls…the looks of pity.
My first day at school was….something else. I made a kind of friend, I guess. His name is Jake. He’s a friendly face in a crowd of unknowns. We only have one class together, but we meet outside often for quick seshs. Pot is the only thing that calms my anxieties and help me focus. It works better than those pills the doctor prescribed after…everything happened.
I met someone else too…someone who made my blood pump. Someone who made my heart flutter and butterflies explode in the pit of my stomach. Someone who made me feel so much in a short half hour than I’ve felt for months. Someone who made time slow down. I’m just as surprised as anyone else, I typically don’t subscribe or believe in that shit. That’s just because it’s never happened to me before.
It’s more than just a physical attraction. Yes, I want him…he’s gorgeous. You’d have to be blind not to want him. He’s got gorgeous Caribbean blue eyes and dirty blond hair. He’s tall, muscular, and he’s got a dimple when he smiles. I am drawn to him. He has awoken something in me that I didn’t even know was asleep. I’ve never felt this kind of attraction or connection to someone before…ever. I think he feels it too. He looks at me and his eyes smoulder. He draws in his breath when I am near, like I’ve stunned him. I see how he looks at me across the classroom. I can’t help but flirt with him, to try and push down the thin film that separates us from one another.
I probably wouldn’t have any reservations about going for him, if he weren’t my English teacher. I guess it’s nice to have something to look forward to, even if it’s just glances across the classroom and day dreams.