Mellow Out

I had my pre-admissions appointment on Monday. I was told I was on a waitlist for surgery and that it could be anywhere from a few weeks to a few months, so I was completely caught off guard when I received a phone call from my specialists receptionist asking if I could get in for 11am tomorrow for the surgery.

Yes, 11am tomorrow. I haven’t even had time yet to process the fact that I’m going to have another surgery. I haven’t had time to consider a game plan.

Naturally, I am freaking out about it. I’m no stranger to operations (I’ve had well over 13 in my lifetime), but that doesn’t make it any less anxiety inducing. Especially when I don’t have any time to prepare my mind (or clean my house!).

And now, I’m panicked about much more than the already scary prospect of being completely immobile for a while…I’m worried about the affect this surgery will have on my children, particularly Nolan.

Both my boys inherited my MHE. I’m worried that I might scare Nolan inadvertently. I’m scared to show that I’m pain as it is. He’s older now, I can’t easily hide it from him.

I know that we will have tons of help from friends and family, but I still can’t help but feel overwhelmed. There’s so much more to worry about now.

I’m going to try and schedule some posts for the next few days, but if I don’t get around to that (I have a lot of cleaning and organizing to do before tomorrow), don’t be alarmed. In the words of Arnold….



About J.C. Hannigan

25. Mother. Wife. Lover of words. Weaver of stories. My first book, Collide, is available in e-book for Amazon Kindle and Kobo.
This entry was posted in anxiety, blogging, challenges, chronic pain, fears, feelings, happenings, hard stuff, health/medical, honesty, MHE, personal, surgery, um what?, verbal diarrhea, words and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to Mellow Out

  1. Oh honey! If you need help posting you can email me. I love you!

  2. It never gets any easier dealing with the anxiety and recovery time from surgeries. People always comment on how i should be a pro with them by now. Even so, doesn’t mean that I’m more relaxed about going under and being cut into. Sheesh. I hope all goes well and recovery is short and as painless as possible. Lots of light and healing vibes my friend!!

    • Jess says:

      Thanks hun! It always bewilders me when people say I’m a pro and should be used to it…if anything, it sucks more because I know what to expect!

  3. Paul Davis says:

    Blessings on your surgery. If you need a cattle prod to make sure the kids behave while you’re recovering, I can procure one šŸ˜‰ Praying for you and your family. And don’t worry. It’ll all work out.

  4. Krystal Linkert says:

    Hope it all goes smooth for you and you recover fast!

  5. tierney says:

    Haven’t posted in a while but have been reading. Sending good vibes your way for tomorrow. If I lived closer I’d make you a lasagna or something but I know you’ll have plenty of help from family and friends. Be good to yourself and don’t push yourself too soon. I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow and in the days that follow!

  6. Pingback: Better(ish) | The Fevered Pen

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