The Word on The Memoir

I haven’t updated on the book progress in a while, so here I am…with an update.

Sarah wanted me to send her what I have by November 1st. That day is seriously creeping up…I have two days to get a move on…and yet here I sit, procrastinating.

That extreme burst of motivation and energy I felt a couple months ago when I started writing? That has all but evaporated. Now I’m feel vulnerable and spent. I felt confident with the memoir back when I started, but now I just don’t feel it.

I wanted to put my all into this book…into this memoir…but I’m realizing that I’ve forgotten a lot about my past and I’m having difficulties dredging things up of interest and importance. I feel like my life is just…boring. My life feels boring. Any time I do think of something to add, I immediately think; what the hell does that have to do with anything?

I feel like this book won’t be the best it can be for a couple of years, until I’ve experienced…more. I feel like I can’t share it all yet, for whatever reason, and I have some other projects waiting in the wings that feel so appealing to me.

It’s been hard finding time to sit down with my laptop and write, to feel that connection I felt in the beginning with this book. It’s been hard to carve out the time and dedication, to pour my heart and soul in, to breathe new life back into it. Be alive, I whisper at it. Only whispering at it and hoping it’ll come back to life is fruitless. I need to bring it back, only I haven’t the slightest idea how to.

The moment Archer goes down for a nap, I’m going to open my files and try yet again to breathe the life back into this project. I’m still going to send what I have to Sarah on Friday, and maybe she’ll see things that I can’t. I think my own depression and indifference towards my book is causing some major blinders for me. Only I’m at a loss for how to to take those blinders off and be one with the book.

No, this isn’t an “I’m giving up” post, never. This is an “I’m searching for a way to get inspired again” post. This is me sorting out my feelings about the book; about the project. This is me hoping to write out some inspiration and kick my writers block.

So, Sarah…if you’re reading this, I have every intention on sending you what I have this Friday. I can’t promise it’ll be any good (or finished), but it’ll be in your email for sure.

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About J.C. Hannigan

25. Mother. Wife. Lover of words. Weaver of stories. My first book, Collide, is available in e-book for Amazon Kindle and Kobo.
This entry was posted in blogging, books, confessions, conflicted, confusion, depression, frustrations, growing, iPhone posting, just thoughts, motivation, musings, on struggles, personal, updates, words, writing and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to The Word on The Memoir

  1. I know the feeling! I can’t wait to hear what you have so far! And you will inspiration again 🙂

  2. Unsure "Adult" says:

    Let me know when it comes out. I’ll be in the front of the line buying them all and selling them for triple. 😉

  3. I have a harder time writing about myself than I do writing fiction. I feel insignificant, or at least not important enough to sell my life story to people. But then I think of all the comments I’ve gotten on different blog posts, about how I’ve helped people without even knowing it. Someday, I will write some kind of memoir—if only just to help those few people further. Your story is important, Jess! Keep going, even on those days when you’re not sure. You’ve helped a lot of people just with your blog, and I know you could help many more by putting your memoir out there.

    • Jess says:

      THIS. The feeling insignificant. That’s what’s getting me. Maybe it’ll just be an “on going” project for the next little while….

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