Nerves…

Truth be told, I am a little nervous for next week. My MIL, Kim, is leaving tomorrow evening. Matt will have the weekend off, but come Monday…I’ll be “by myself”…although my friend Robyn is coming for a few days, I’m still gonna consider myself “back in action” because I need “re-training”. Robyn will more or less be there to help out when I really need it.
But…sleep training. For myself, not the baby, cause he sleeps awesome. You know how they always say, “sleep when the baby sleeps?” Well…like Danielle said, you can’t when you have older kids. Or at least, I can’t. If Nolan is awake, I can’t sleep. Which, you know, is a good thing, but not when the child doesn’t nap. At all. He has “quiet time” in his room, for sure, but I can’t sleep through his quiet time. It seems…wrong. 
But I am so exhausted by like 2pm that I need to sleep. Or something…and I can’t. Because, Nolan doesn’t nap. So I’m nervous about that. I do plan on going to bed right when Nolan does {most nights, anyway, Thursdays are totally for Vampire Diaries and Greys Anatomy}, but I’m worried that won’t be enough, considering I still have several weeks of this whole “healing process” to contend with. Once I’m all good to go, I know sleep won’t matter as much.
Funny thing to worry about now huh? This whole sleep business? Considering that we already have the baby. Hah. But seriously, Nolan slept like a pro until I was about 7 months pregnant, then he decided that nap time would be a rare occurrence and I was all “oh shit. Now what?”
I think what I’m nervous most about is not having the energy to do fun things with Nolan, and obviously…that’s not cool. I love doing fun things with Nolan! I don’t want him thinking that having the baby around really sucks.
Nolan is a great older brother, he helps with diaper changes and he is gentle {for the most part} with his “baby”. He still hasn’t held Archer on his own because he just doesn’t want to, and he thinks that the baby must be held by me at all times. When he sees Nana or Daddy with Archer, he demands that the baby go back to me. He also doesn’t want my cuddles anymore 😦 I’ll ask him to come sit with me for cuddles, and he’ll say “NO MOMMY!”, or {if I grab him for cuddles}, he’ll whine at Nana to “save him” from my cuddles 😦 Hopefully he will go back to being my cuddly Nolan bear soon because I miss our morning boob tube cuddles. 
Sigh. Tips people!
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About J.C. Hannigan

25. Mother. Wife. Lover of words. Weaver of stories. My first book, Collide, is available in e-book for Amazon Kindle and Kobo.
This entry was posted in day to day stuff, life as I know it, quick notes, the boys, toddlerhood, updates. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Nerves…

  1. Heather says:

    I've never BTDT, but don't feel guilty if you have to sit Nolan in front of the tv longer than normal to get a little rest. This is only going to last a few months and before you know, you'll be back in action!

  2. jess ♥ says:

    @Heather: I suppose you're right!!! Still sucks. I'm dreading the first time I take both of them out solo 😐

  3. iamtheanykey says:

    Blog-delurking and finally posting a comment…

    Heather IS right. Once you are fully healed and regain your energy, and Archer has regular naptimes, it becomes a TON easier.

    Consider yourself in the fourth trimester, right now. Archer needs you all the time for feedings, and while that will take away from Nolan a bit, and you can't pick him up or play too actively right this moment (or month), you will be able to, and he will quickly forget.

    Try to keep him involved as much as you can, read books, get him to show toys to Archer, sing with you to Archer, etc, and he will find this a fun time and continue to bond with you, and a strong bond will grow between the boys.

    I was terrified and had two panic attacks about taking both kids out by myself, but it's easy. (Keep car-safe snacks on hand for Nolan, and if he's a thrower, don't give him anything he could potentially toss onto Archer…)

    Just make sure you are fully healed before you try to go anywhere in the car with both, in case you have to lift Nolan for anything (I'd say MINIMUM 4 weeks post baby, others might say longer, probably best to work up to his weight after 4 weeks, to about 8 weeks, that area will still be very delicate and toddlers are heavy and uncontrollable. I ended up going to emerg a couple times and got frowned at by a bunch of doctors for doing too much. Don't be me. lol).

    Tv or movies or anything you can use to get a little rest while Nolan is awake is not a bad thing, you can always cut it back as you feel better.

    And for somethings' sake, woman, any kind of time where Nolan is quiet and in his room (be it nap or just play time), try to nap. Lay down, picture something peaceful and doze.

    If you can't get to sleep because your mind is racing, write down quickly what's on your mind (bullet form on anything handy) and 'shelve' it until you are done resting. (Try it a few times, it works for me, now!)(mostly)

    I hope this transition period goes smoothly for you, just focus on resting and bonding your new family together for a bit, who cares about the rest?

    Good luck, always here if you need anything! (Wish I lived closer, I'd come take Nolan for a walk so you could nap. And snuggle Archer so you could shower.)

  4. You will do great. I was nervous about being alone with both kids for the first time too (I was alone the day after we returned home from the hospital!). My best advice is to learn to let some things go. Dishes and laundry and vacuuming and all that jazz can wait. Landon ate toast or waffles for breakfast almost every day for a month after Hannah was born because it was quick and easy. I did make ahead lunches like pasta, chicken vegetable fried rice, etc…so that it was just a matter of reheating Landon's food for lunch times. For the first three months after I had Hannah I went to bed EARLY. Like as soon as Landon was in bed, so was I. During Nolan's quiet time, try to lay down on the couch. Landon was still napping back when Hannah was born, so I'd just take Hannah with me and we'd both lay in bed…even if we didn't sleep, it was nice just to get a chance to lay down. Likewise, for when Archer sleeps. You and Nolan can lay on the couch together watching one of his favourite shows or something.

  5. jess ♥ says:

    @iamtheanykey: The fourth trimester…what a great way to think of things lol! I'll try all those suggestions 🙂 thank you!

    @Danielle-Marie: Alone the DAY AFTER you returned from the hospital?! HOLY HELL! How did you do it!? I was passed out for two days! Waffles and toast sounds like easy game, Nolan loves them both anyway. I definitely have no interest in cooking right now but I will. The lay down on the couch/bed thing sounds rad, I've been doing it lol. It does help a bit! Thank you for the suggestions!

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