I get a little bummed out that I can’t make my visions a reality.
I had certain things in mind for our home, for our boys’ bedrooms…
and it sucks that I can’t just make them happen with a snap of my finger.
I had this totally modern, awesome owl incorporated theme planned out for sweet baby’s nursery…
but then I had to reel myself in.
Because life happened, and life is expensive and you can’t really budget for it.
At least not as strictly as I’ve been trying to.
So now, we’re recycling Nolan’s nursery theme & changing things up by painting furniture.
I hope that it will make the room entirely different…but who knows.
I’m also bummed out because I wanted to have the spare bedroom, play room, and rec room all set up by October.
…I doubt that will happen.
We were so close to buying a super awesome couch and chair for our rec room,
but then my exhaust blew.
So, no awesome couch and chair.
No finished rec room.
And I know, we will get there…one day. Maybe not as soon as I want to be there…but we’ll get there.
For the most part, I am incredibly okay with everything and super happy.
For the most part, I know that it doesn’t matter what my boys’ bedrooms look like – they don’t care.
I know that the gift isn’t the space you put them into, but just having them.
I just get bummed out that I can’t do/give them more.
Cute bedrooms, family vacations, trips to the zoo.
Sometimes, I get bummed out reading about everyone elses’ adventures.
I want to have adventures, adventures with my boys…with my family.
But adventures, cost money. Generally.
Sometimes I feel stuck because I have all these to-do lists, all these bucket lists that I want to start crossing things off of…and yet…I can’t.
For whatever reason.
Emily said it best: it is the root of all evil.
I dislike telling myself “oh, we’ll go do this next year…when we have the money”…
feels like I’ve been saying that for years now.
I am thankful for good health, and for what we do have.
We are lucky…I know that.
We have a roof over our heads, food in our fridge, and clothes on our backs.
Bills are overwhelming…but they get paid.
But I can’t help but feel that if we had just a little more money, we’d be able to enjoy things more,
we’d be able to appreciate the finer things because we wouldn’t be so wrapped up in worries and stress.
I guess I’m just having a hard day…
one of those sometimes days.
I’ve come to realize that our camping trip might not happen.
And it makes me incredibly sad, because I was so looking forward to it…
but, camping is expensive.
We didn’t get on our feet like I thought we would this month.
Bills ended up being more than I accounted for, the whole car/exhaust thing…our trip down South.
That’s life, right?